The Right Honourable Stephen Harper
Office of the Prime Minister
80 Wellington Street
Ottawa, Ontario K1A 0A2
Canada
Dear Stephen Harper,
Have you heard the news from Russia? There’s this silly new law there, whereby
it’s actually illegal to publicly promote or defend gay rights. Not only are you not supposed to be gay, but
you’re not supposed to even talk about it.
If you do, forget social taboos and communal self-censorship: the very
law is against you. Can you believe
that? How did they get that
through? What if Edward Snowden is
gay? The questions!
Anyway, I’m sure you haven’t heard about this, because as
far as I can tell, you haven’t said a word.
Surely, if you guys in the Canadian government got wind of this, there’d
have to be some action!
But, to be honest, I’m not surprised you haven’t heard
anything. That which is left of the CBC
after your repeated hatchet jobs (and it isn’t much, if their online journalism
is any indication) either doesn’t care or doesn’t have the resources to care
about this one. And the rest of Canadian
national journalism doesn’t have much of a gaydar either. So please, allow my letter to herald the awful
abuse and gross stupidity from across the Arctic: the Russian government is out
of line.
Oh, and it’s perfect timing too, almost ridiculously so. To freshen your memory, they’ve got the
Olympics coming up. And it’s not just
any Olympics: it’s the Winter Olympics – you know, our kind of Olympics. So, not
only does your government have the responsibility to act, as should be obvious,
but now you’ve got a great opportunity.
What would the world say (well, the half of the world that knows the
Winter Olympics exist) if Canada put on the pressure, or threatened to
boycott? I think a lot of heads would
turn, a lot of others would consider following suit, and – just maybe – the
Russians would have to actually answer the question of what the hell they’re
doing beyond the typical “this is our internal affairs” line.
And, while you’re still with me (you are still with me,
right, Stephen?), let me address this bogus crap about internal affairs. What does
Canada have to say about Syria these days?
You know, they’ve got that civil war going on, tens of thousands killed,
over a million refugees. And the conflict
itself? Almost entirely within their borders!
I noticed you haven’t shut up about that one. What about China, Sudan, Lebanon, Afghanistan, and formerly Myanmar (Burma), all of which you’ve had plenty to say about – and plenty to act upon,
too. So much for minding your own
business, eh? Should I mention North
Korea and Iran? Yes, those guys are
throwing about their missiles and intentions on the global stage, so you’ve got
a smooth and solid briefcase full of “international security” reasons to speak
up there. But I notice that when you do,
you just can’t help yourself from mentioning human rights, democracy, the
people, and all the rest of the so-called domestic portfolio.
Is it too cheap a shot to bring in your Office of Religious Freedom, which has a purely international focus? Or is that too obvious? Yeah, you’re right: protect one freedom of expression, ignore the other – definitely too obvious.
I’m also curious: would Canada support bids for the Olympic Games
in Mauritania (death to homosexuals), Saudi Arabia (death to homosexuals), Chad
(death to homosexuals), or dozens of other countries with abhorrent human
rights and (lack of) free speech protections?
I mean, if they could prove they’d do the Olympics really well, had the
money and the resources and the infrastructure and the weather – well? I think I know your answer: no.
And I think I can just hear your soaring speech (okay, not so much soaring, but polemical, yes, polemical)
to back that up, your verbal howitzer assault (okay, okay... joust?) against
human rights violations, against autocrats treating people like dirt,against a
pathetic lack of press freedom, and the rest of the cascade of sins in that
country’s internal affairs.
Oh, wait a second… Are
you about to agree with international law, humanitarian precedent and good
moral sense, and say that human rights is not an internal issue – especially to
any UN member who has thus agreed to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights – but a global
one which binds all nations and peoples?
If so, you must already be conjuring a Russian action plan, and you may
now breathe a sigh of relief and skip to the end of the letter.
But, if not – or, if you’re holding back and hiding in the
closet –well, why not? It couldn’t be
that you don’t think gay rights are human rights, could it? Because, Stephen, that’s what people will
assume you think once they know that you know about what’s going on in Russia,
and aren’t doing anything.So, what? Is
it not prudent? Are you worried about a
trade relationship? Are you waiting for
some other country to jump in first (which would be fantastically Canadian, you
got me there)? Or – no… You’re not afraid of Vladimir Putin’s nuclear
missile, are you? Trust me, I really
don’t think he’s going to launch it at you for criticizing how he deals with
gay people.
And don’t you start giving me that turkey about Israel and
its internal affairs. There’s another
story I don’t think you’ve heard: did you know the Israeli government is still (seriously – isn’t it crazy?)
building settlements in Palestinian territory, and engaging in what can only
amount to apartheid and long-term genocide?
Oh, so sorry, that’s their internal affairs, their sacred right to
self-determination. I guess I’m
off-topic.
Anyways, there’s really no question if you care about what’s
internal and what’s external in the affairs of other countries, unless
mentioning that divide allows you to do nothing.
So let’s just get to it.
You are the leader of a country which has enshrined laws that uphold and
advance gay rights, not just of the party which voted against them. And, listen here Stephen, come close: you can even put gay marriage aside for now. Really, you can! Because I’m not saying you should rattle the
sabre (or rock the bobsled – as you will) to force Russia to adopt same-sex
weddings. You don’t even have to mention
it.
No, no – this one is easy as pie. This one is human rights, from one Olympic
nation to another.
And now you know about it.
What are you going to do?
Yours expectantly,
